I am re-reading a book by Carl Rogers, ‘On becoming a person’, one I read many years ago when studying for my degree. I chose a counselling module as I thought it would be useful and give me an extra insight in my work with patients when trying to build a good and trusting relationship in a very short space of time whilst they were in the day surgery unit I was working in. I am sure it did help. It certainly helps me when meeting new coaching clients currently.
What impressed me most was the calm acceptance that Rogers had for all of humanity. It was a way of being that impressed me immensely. ‘Unconditional positive regard’. No judgement in his interactions with his clients. This meant judgement in any way, good or bad, accepting what is, trying to be completely at one with where the client is at a particular moment in their lives. By being this way he was able to understand more completely what it was to be that person at that particular time. By accepting the person completely he was not putting any pressure on for the future to be any different unless they chose to it to be. He felt that even positive comments implied a judgement which in turn gave the commenter power over the future of the individual; by the possibility of being able to withdraw that praise of to have an expectation of its continuity. The individual is then able to decide what is right for him/herself without outside influence.
His approach to psychotherapy intrigues me, it is not didactic as some methods are and it is an approach that suits me, one of self discovery; one that I adapt and use within my own coaching practice.
I accept people as they are, completely.
I allow people the time and space to explore what it is they are looking to achieve with me within their coaching program. As they grow to understand themselves more, then they can start to make plans and set goals towards achieving what ever it is that they have decided to go for in their lives. Knowing that it is exactly right for them at that time because they have made time to discover what drives them, what their values are and how it all fits together to make a whole person centred plan that works perfectly. A well balanced plan.
Rogers believed that every person can achieve their goals, wishes and desires in life. When, or rather if they did so, self actualization took place. This was one of Carl Rogers most important contributions to psychology and for a person to reach their potential a number of factors must be satisfied.
“The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination” (Rogers, 1967,).
There is much more about Carl Rogers that I can talk about but this tiny part of him has fired my inspiration to write this today.
Have a great week ahead. Love and best wishes Jennie
My method of coaching is to make it upbeat and fun in a structured way. You may not notice the structure as I take you though a series of stages to help you to become re-empowered within yourself. I use my skills to encourage you to think positively about your own life experience and to draw out the strengths and skills that you may have forgotten you had or that may be transferable to other areas of your life. As we talk I will encourage you to think about what you want to achieve and to start to plan and set goals for yourself.
You can contact me on 01455 292068 or 07510 821 542, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this post I’ve written of if you think I can help you with coaching then I’d like to hear from you too. Please do leave a message if I’m not able to answer